A Ceremony Is Not A Performance.

Over this past summer, as I worked every weekend on a wedding, I had a wonderful time getting to help produce some very different and unique weddings. That's the great thing about this job, is that you really get to try it all. You get to see what it would be like if someone actually did *that* or had *that* or managed to pull *that* off at their wedding.. and it's fun to do new things every weekend.

However.

There were a couple times this season that I noticed a little more about the different and unique ceremonies. They were more of a performance than a marriage ceremony. Either the couple was way too picky, and detailed about how they would be seen during the moments giving their vows, or they were too worried about how every little thing had to be just right.

Now let me set straight the line between a performance, and making things pretty.

Dictionary definition for performance:

per·for·mance
noun
: an activity that a person or group does to entertain an audience.

Did you see that? "Entertain.."

Now, is a marriage ceremony about entertaining an audience? I don't think so.

Dictionary definition for ceremony:

cer·e·mo·ny
noun

: a formal act or event that is a part of a social or religious occasion

: very polite or formal behavior


Now obviously, I'm a wedding planner. I out of all people understand how all the little things need to be done correctly in order for everything to be perfect. I like to make things pretty, and special. But I also am a traditionalist. And I love the incredible, powerful and emotional importance of what a wedding ceremony is about. I mean after all, the reception is a celebration for what the ceremony holds. The ceremony should be about two people coming together as one. They are giving their lives to one another, to make it one life they will live together until the day they die.

The people seated behind or around you, are there as witnesses to that vow. Because they love and care for you. Sure, the set up can be (and I think should be), pretty. And it should be special. But, it's not about performing to the guests. Doing all this confusing choreography, standing here, now there, worrying about who can see you when... They all can see you just fine, even if they only see your backs. They still know what they're watching, and understand why they are there. You, as the bride or groom, just need to focus on why YOU'RE there. What's happening in front of you and to you. Don't worry about anything else! It's about vowing a new life with that person you're holding hands with, and what the officiant is saying. Don't make it a big show. It's already an amazing show. It doesn't need more than that.

Hope that isn't too confusing. It's not always easy for me to write down what is in my head, to make sense of what I'm expressing.

Until next time..
t.

"Stop Being Yourself." Yup, I said it.

As most people have noticed lately, the world is telling us to "just be ourselves" and "express yourself." Hmmm.

When I have an issue, and I'm in need of some work on my heart or attitude, the LAST person I need to consult is myself. I'm the problem in the first place!

Now I know that most of the reason behind the world's view on this is for people to not worry about how they "should be" compared to the rest of the world. That we should "feel good and comfortable in our own skin." We'll yeah, sure, we shouldn't conform ourselves for others.
But the Bible says to live our lives through and in Christ. So if that's how we are to live, but the world says live in our own (human, flesh, sinful,) self, then that would collide with acting stupidly. Like living under the abuse and addiction of drugs, alcohol, self image, homosexuality, ect. You cannot live a life of what YOU think is right and be under the image of Christ. You (I,) have to live in the image of Christ at all times. And if there's something I myself likes or wants to be or do or feel that does not agree with what God says in His Word, then I have to understand why I have to choose against it. Does that make any sense?

So many people today are saying "whatever is right for you, is right for you. And something else can be right for me." Oh my goodness, the millions of problems that leads to!

I guess I could continue down a whole road on that subject and go for miles. But I don't want to right now. I just wanted to get across a main point that I fear we are falling so deep into that is ruining our generation.

First, sure, look at yourself. See what you are and how dirty you are. And then TURN to Christ, and see what HE is. How perfect He is!
"And having been made perfect, He became to all those who obey Him the source of eternal salvation," Hebrews 5:9 (NASB)
Let Him live in and through you. Living for yourself will never work, never feel complete and never give you the true full life you desire. It may feel good for a moment, but will lead you down an awful road.

"For as through the one man's disobedience the many were made sinners, even so through the obedience of the One the many will be made righteous." Romans 5:19 (NASB)

So, if you truly want your inner heart, your inner desires, and your whole self to be in the image of Christ, then please! Be yourself! But that's a hard place to stay, (because we are all still sinners.) So, I am going to use the personality traits God gave me, and express the woman He made me to be, but be like Christ. It's not easy! And I will fail. Time after time. We all will. Thank the Lord He already forgave us! But I'd choose that battle any day over being just like the rest of the world which will lie to you over and over again.

"And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2 (NASB)

t.